Self Doubt, Self Belief And Trusting Myself

I’ve never been very good at believing in myself.

What I am good at, is questioning myself. Every little thing I do and decision I make is overshadowed with a sprinkle of doubt.

Am I choosing the correct career path?

Does this dress really look good on me?

Does this essay sound smart enough?

I always am the first to tell others that they’re doing a great job and to trust themselves. Why don’t I tell myself this more often?

I’ll tell you why:

Because we are our own worst critic. We say things to ourselves that we wouldn’t dream of saying to others.

Why?

Because those things we’ve been telling ourselves are downright rude, mean, insensitive and untrue. If we say them to others we are a labelled a bitch, but somehow we justify saying them to ourselves.

The thing is – it shouldn’t be justified. Because if you hear something enough times, you start to believe it – even if it’s coming from your own mouth or said secretly in your head. And once you believe it, the initial damage has been done, and it becomes more and more difficult to escape from the toxic spiral of self-doubt.

Of course, it’s normal to have self-doubt and feel bad about ourselves at times, but it’s how you deal with those emotions that makes all the difference. You can give those negative thoughts power and let them control you, or you can take the upper hand and control them, using those thoughts as motivation to challenge yourself and make yourself a better person.

We are told to be kind, loving, and accepting of others, but just imagine how much kinder the world would be if we were more accepting of ourselves. You can’t pour from an empty cup. Trust yourself first, then you can love and trust others.

We all have heard of the saying “treat others the way you’d like to be treated” but why don’t we treat ourselves how we’d like to be treated?

– Karen xx

30 thoughts on “Self Doubt, Self Belief And Trusting Myself

  1. Love this post! I’m awful for doubting myself, but that last line of treating myself the way I want to be treated & treat others has really hit me. It’s a good way to look at it, and I’m gonna do my best to remember that the next time self doubt creeps in.

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  2. The flaws and shortcomings I love in other people, I hate them about myself. It’s like everyone has the right to make mistakes and suck at thing, but I don’t.
    I wonder where this comes from? Childhood?

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  3. So true! It’s darn tough to be happy when someone is mean to you all day, and we are often our own worst enemies in this regard. It’s a difficult habit to break, but that’s what it is: a habit. And we can all overcome it. A good first step is to find 3 kind things to say to yourself each morning when you get up – we all have great qualities, we just need to learn to dwell on them a little more often. Nice post and thank you for sharing!
    Joan Senio
    My Best Friend Adeline
    kindness-compassion-and-coaching.com
    @joansenio1

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  4. This is so true! I definitely find myself struggling with this, even when I *should* feel on top of my game. Thanks for sharing πŸ’•

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  5. Oh gosh you are so right – we are our worst critics! I’m exactly like you in the sense that I always think lowly of myself and yet I’m always praising others… I should be cheering myself on, too!

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  6. I love this, and completely agree – it’s time we all tried to be kind to ourselves, as much as anyone else, myself included. Especially me, actually. I am awful to myself sometimes.

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  7. Self-doubt is such a normal thing in my life, and at one point it really affected me. I was constantly so down on myself. I started using affirmations in a way to make myself feel better, and while at first I felt extremely silly, it helped counteract the negative doubt. Great post Karen xx

    Melina | http://www.melinaelisa.com

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  8. I am so familiar with that. I question everything I do multiple times and come up with multiple scenarios. Sometimes I do this because I don’t trust myself but I think mostly because I fear I won’t like the outcome. But I get so overwhelmed with so many scenarios that I just give up.

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